letter four to rahel: magical gardens and icy lakes

rahel, oh rahel.


what a month it’s been indeed. madness. it feels like just yesterday when we were jumping up and down in tanika’s flat on nye, singing along to 1d tunes and wearing party hats. great memories. somehow, it’s also been a very long month, though. and just like for you, my last week has felt like a month in itself.

i’m sorry you miss magnus. (although i wish you missed me more than him. because i am very selfish and possessive. but that ain’t news, really) i know what it feels like to spend a lot of time with a person you care about over a given period of time, only for them to suddenly be away. it’s as though you grew an extra limb and got used to being able to do all those amazing things with set extra hand or foot, to then be confronted with the reality of it being gone and having to readjust to only having those two arms and legs you had to begin with (or however many extremities you may have had. we don’t discriminate here) interestingly enough, i experienced something very similar yet entirely different just the day before magnus left. but you already know that.

i’m not great at farewells. well, most people probably aren’t. perhaps i’m just especially rubbish at them. they’re easier to stomach when the next rendez-vous is already arranged, of course. sadly, however, that’s not always the case, and sadly, we sometimes know we might never talk to the person we said goodbye to again. ever since i moved away, i feel like people in switzerland have gotten used to seeing me go. like they don’t care as much anymore. which is a bit of a shite feeling. because i still find it strange to leave every single time. and i still miss all of you every single time. i was on the tram with sophia and louanne just before lou headed off to paris for her erasmus, and sophia said, in one of her seldom outbursts of emotion, that she’d really miss louanne when she was gone. and i couldn’t help but wonder whether she, sophia, sometimes misses me, too. it’s like my being gone has become somewhat of a given, a status quo, so to speak, so it’s easier to let me go. oh well. i digress.

this week has not only felt like it has been stretched as though it were one of those disgusting massive bubblegums my brother and i used to eat as children. no, this week also has been one of the best overall weeks i’ve had in a long, long time. the main reason for the unexpected gleefulness of the last seven days lies in music; in a collaboration, to be exact. barney and leo, potentially the loveliest northerners there ever have been, have taken it upon themselves to arrange on of my songs on monday. which i didn’t hear until wednesday night. bloody teases. i know it’s been four days, but i am genuinely still a tad overwhelmed at the wizardry with which they turned a song of mine into something i actually want to show to people and into something i want the world to hear as opposed to my usual “yeah, it’s just a quick thing i did, and it’s not great, and you probably shouldn’t listen to it anyway”. which is an utterly unknown feeling for me. pride, in a way, that something i did could inspire something like their track, but also relief, that i seem to have found someone, well sometwo, who understands exactly what i am trying to express through my music without ever having been able to verbalise it. i’m excited. can you tell? as we speak, they’re actually working on another song. so yeah. music has been happening.

in addition to that working, i actually had a lovely date yesterday. i know, right? i’m just as surprised as you are. we walked around in regent’s park first, got lost, tried to find a lake to go boating, only to be confronted with a “closed” sign. pfft. good thing my date was extraordinarily well organised, so we hopped on the tube (in the wrong direction first. not that well organised after all) to go ice-skating. brilliantly cliché. i loved it. especially the part where he basically knocked over an adorable little boy (probably because he was jealous that i had called the lilun adorable). great times. we had tea and cake at good ol’ yumchaa in soho (the very same in which i was last week, which was actually also the first time i spoke to mr. date on the phone) until they closed and strolled to oxford circus, where our ways parted. so yeah. that was nice.

enough soppy stories now. the book. i agree with you agreeing with me. i was left unsatisfied. the end seemed fabricated and, frankly, a bit cheap. i still gave the book a rounded up 4 stars on goodreads, mainly because i loved the writing style and the setting. the plot, however, could have done with a bit more, well, plot.

my cooking decision was much easier than yours, it would appear. i settled on making latkes pretty early on, seeing as eddie is jewish and latkes are great. i added a bit of finely chopped onion into the mixture and devoured the little potato pancakes with plain yogurt (instead of the traditional sour cream) and the ever so classical apple sauce.


i hope all is well and i shall speak to you soon.


p.s. tell rosalie i said hi.


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Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

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